Another version

I like this version of “Just Walk On By” way better than the original. I think it was written much better and also delivered a more precise message. It seemed to be very effective. I like how he started out with a better description of himself. It added to the image that I got in my head when I was reading and I could get a feel for how a simple thing like clothing could make someone look a lot bigger or terrifying than they truly are. Just his presence actually disturbed people and made them huddle in fear. I feel like the description of himself makes the reader really jump into what he is thinking as he is walking down the sidewalk. I’m also glad that he edited out a few stories such as the one about him being a journalist and getting the security called on him by mistake. It was a pretty good account of how his life truly is, but I felt like some of them became a little repetitive, so that revision worked well in my opinion. But he also added a new story that I felt added to the piece. The story of how he played scatter the pigeons was amusing and I’m glad that he could look at it from another perspective such as turning people’s misguided fears into a game. I feel like Staples has to put on an act every time he walks out of his front door, but that is where our society has taken us. Once again, this just shows how stereotypes are so common even in the modern day. It actually scares me that people can have these false assumptions and live in fear based off discrimination and things that they have probably only seen on the news or in movies.